Have you ever woken up, stared at the ceiling, and asked yourself, “Is this really all there is about life?” You’re not alone. That quiet ache, that persistent feeling that something’s missing is one of the most common struggles women have. Finding your purpose in life isn’t just some out of the world concept. It’s an important aspect of your wellbeing.
I remember spending five years of my life pursuing a degree that looked perfect on paper. I checked all the boxes, did everything “right.” But inside? I felt empty. Each day became harder than the last, and that creeping depression and hopelessness started following me everywhere. Maybe you know that feeling too.
“But everyone else seems to have it figured out,” you might think as you scroll through Instagram. Trust me, they don’t.
The hardest part isn’t just feeling lost but it’s feeling lost while exhausted from trying so hard. You’ve read the self-help books, made the vision boards and listened to the podcasts. Yet that question still haunts you: “Is this all that life has for me?”
Here’s what I want you to know right now: this emptiness isn’t a sign you’re living life wrong. It’s actually your inner wisdom nudging you toward something better. Something more aligned with who you truly are.
In this post, I’ll help you recognize the obvious (and not-so-obvious) signs that you haven’t found your purpose yet, understand how this purpose gap might be affecting your health and happiness, and share practical first steps that helped me and other women start reconnecting with what truly matters.
And if you’re ready for more guided support, our Free 7-Day Purpose Discovery Email Course walks you through this journey step by step. Because finding your purpose in life shouldn’t feel like another overwhelming task on your to-do list. To sign up, enter your name and email below and then click the beautiful blue button and you will start empowering your wellbeing with your purpose.
Let’s begin with the signs that might be quietly telling you it’s time for a change…
The Cost of Having No Purpose in Life
Living without a clear purpose in life is like wearing a backpack that is invisible and filled with rocks. You can’t quite see it, but you definitely feel its weight. Every. Single. Day.
You might not even realize that a lack of purpose is the reason behind your struggles. Instead, you blame your job, your relationship, or even yourself. But research from the Journal of Clinical Psychology shows that purpose in life acts as a fundamental psychological need – when it’s missing, we feel it throughout our entire being.
How Absence of Purpose in Life Shows Up in Your Daily Life
Let’s talk about what this actually looks like day-to-day. Not in clinical terms, but in real human experience:
- Persistent feeling of emptiness. This one hits hard. Imagine going through your day checking off all your to-do list like getting the promotion, cleaning the house, going for a that event but still feeling empty inside. One study published in the National Library of Medicine found that women with lower purpose in life scores reported feeling “emotionally numb” even during activities they used to enjoy. Sound familiar? That’s because without purpose, achievements become just items on a list rather than meaningful milestones.
- Low enthusiasm and unclear goals. Last month, my friend Sarah told me, “I have a good job, but I have no idea what I’m working toward anymore.” She’s stuck in the Monday-to-Friday workweek, saving for vacations she doesn’t feel excited about, and watching Netflix shows she forgets as soon as they’re over. When your purpose in life is unclear, your goals become foggy too. You might find yourself saying “I should…” a lot, but rarely “I can’t wait to…”
- Overthinking, self-doubt, and unexplainable anxiety. Without purpose providing direction, your mind wanders into dangerous territories. Research shows that people with lower purpose in life scores experience more rumination; that spiral of thoughts that keeps you up at 2 AM questioning everything from your career choices to that awkward thing you said in 8th grade.
- Avoiding risks and being stuck in comfort zone. “I’ll just stick with what I know” becomes your mantra. According to the NCBI research, people lacking clear purpose tend to avoid challenges that might lead to growth. Think about it – when was the last time you tried something that scared you a little? Purpose in life gives us courage to step beyond what’s safe.
- Unexplained fatigue. You’re sleeping enough, eating well, maybe even exercising but you’re still exhausted. This isn’t just physical tiredness. Research indicates that purpose-deficit fatigue stems from the emotional and mental energy spent navigating life without clear direction. Your brain is constantly working overtime trying to find meaning.
- Comparison and envy. Scrolling through social media becomes painful because everyone else seems to have found their calling. Your college roommate is saving the rainforest. Your cousin is building a thriving business. Meanwhile, you’re wondering why nothing lights up that spark in you. Purpose in life isn’t about doing extraordinary things but about finding meaning in whatever you do.
Each of these signs connects to that fundamental human need for purpose in life. When researchers at the Journal of Clinical Psychology studied purpose across different age groups, they found that purpose wasn’t just nice to have. It was essential for psychological well-being regardless of life stage.
PIN ME FOR LATER PLEASE!!!!
Reflection Moment
Which of these signs have you noticed in your own life? Journal them out honestly.
Take a moment now. Grab a notebook. Don’t judge what comes up – just acknowledge where you are. Recognizing these patterns isn’t admitting defeat; it’s the first step toward finding your path.
Remember, the weight of living without purpose isn’t something you’re imagining. It’s real, it’s backed by science, and most importantly, it can change.
Why Discovering Purpose in Life Changes Everything
The day I finally made the decision to leave that misaligned degree program was terrifying. But the moment I stepped into pursuing work that actually mattered to me? Everything shifted not just emotionally, but physically and neurologically too.
The Energy Transformation
Remember that bone-deep fatigue I mentioned? It didn’t disappear overnight. But gradually, I noticed something interesting: I could work longer hours on my purpose-aligned projects without feeling drained. In fact, I often felt energized after.
This isn’t just my experience. Purpose literally changes how your body uses energy. When you’re aligned with your purpose, your brain releases more dopamine and norepinephrine which are chemicals that boost motivation and focus. Think of purpose as your internal battery charger.
More importantly, purpose gives you patience for the process. During tough moments building my new path, I no longer saw obstacles as signs to quit. They became interesting problems to solve.
Resilience That Rebuilds You
Before finding my purpose, every setback felt like evidence I was on the wrong path. Now, setbacks feel like valuable feedback.
Decision-Making Becomes Clearer
One of the most practical benefits? Making decisions gets so much easier.
I now have a simple filter: “Does this align with my purpose?” If not, it’s usually a no. This isn’t about having a rigid 10-year plan. It’s about having a compass that points to your true north.
Relationships Deepen
Perhaps most surprising was how my relationships transformed. I started prioritizing healthy connections over just connections. People who energized my purpose stayed; those who drained it naturally faded away.
People with strong purpose tend to form deeper, more supportive relationships. They’re less likely to stay in draining connections simply from fear or habit.
Purpose isn’t about grand life plans or impressive achievements. It’s about finding meaning in your everyday moments. It’s waking up and knowing that today, even with its challenges, connects to something that matters to you.
And that changes everything.
First Steps: How to Start Finding Your Purpose
Finding your purpose isn’t like flipping a light switch. It’s more like sunrise. It is gradual, sometimes cloudy, but ultimately illuminating everything. Be patient with yourself. This journey takes time.
When I began searching for my own purpose, I felt overwhelmed. Where do you even start? Through trial and error (and yes, plenty of false starts), I discovered practical entry points that actually work.
Reconnect with Childhood Joys
Remember what you loved before the world told you what to love? For me, it was writing stories. I’d forgotten how much it energized me until I found an old journal from age 12.
Try this: Write down three activities that absorbed you completely as a child. How might those translate into adult life?
Volunteer Beyond Your Comfort Zone
Volunteer experiences create “purpose triggers” which are moments that activate your sense of contribution and meaning. The key is choosing something that stretches you.
Journal Deeply (Not Just Occasionally)
Irregular journaling didn’t help me much. But consistent, purposeful reflection? Game-changer.
Prompt 1: What are the moments in your life when you felt the most alive and fulfilled?
Prompt 2: Describe a time when you overcame a significant challenge. What did you learn about yourself?
Surround Yourself with Inspiring People
I didn’t realize how much my friends who had no clear purpose in life were reinforcing my own lack of purpose until I changed my social circle.
Purpose is socially contagious. You literally “catch” purpose from people who have it.
Clarify Your Values First, Then Set Goals
I spent years chasing goals that looked good but felt empty because they weren’t aligned with my actual values. Try listing your top five values (like creativity, connection, learning). Then evaluate your current goals against them. The misalignments will surprise you.
Pro Tip: Try the Ikigai Method
The Ikigai method has been my most powerful tool for purpose discovery. This Japanese concept finds your purpose at the intersection of:
- What you love
- What you’re good at
- What the world needs
- What you can be rewarded for
Draw four overlapping circles with these categories. Where they all meet is your “ikigai” – your reason for being. This visual exercise clarified my purpose more than years of just thinking about it.
Begin Your Guided Journey
The steps above are powerful starting points, but you don’t have to figure it all out alone. Our Free 7-Day Purpose Discovery Email Course walks you through this process step by step, with daily guidance designed specifically to empower your wellbeing by helping you feel fulfilled.
Each day builds on the last, creating a clear path toward your unique purpose in life. Let’s walk this journey together. Sign up below by inserting your name, email and clicking the beautiful blue button.
Conclusion
If you’ve recognized yourself in the signs we’ve discussed – the emptiness, the fatigue, the uncertainty – please know this: feeling lost doesn’t mean you’re failing at life. It actually means you’re ready for something more meaningful.
Finding your purpose is like riding a bicycle. The more you pedal, the more progress you make. At first, you might wobble or even fall. That’s normal. But each small movement forward builds momentum. And knowing your destination – your purpose, your why – helps you choose the right routes to get there.
What matters most isn’t how quickly you find your purpose in life, but that you start looking. Start small. Ask one deep question today. Make one tiny shift tomorrow. Stay open to discovering what truly matters to you, even if it surprises you. Finding your why isn’t about reaching a fixed destination – it’s about embracing a journey of continuous discovery.
You’re not meant to feel empty or unfulfilled. You’re designed for purpose. For meaning. For work and relationships that energize rather than drain you.
And you don’t have to navigate this journey alone. Our Free 7-Day Purpose Discovery Email Course provides the structure, support, and guidance many women need to move from feeling lost to finding clarity. Each day builds on the last, creating a clear path toward uncovering your unique purpose.
Take that first pedal stroke today. Your future self which is purposeful, energized, and clear is waiting for you to begin.
Join the Free 7-Day Purpose Discovery Course below by inserting your name, email and clicking on the blue button below.
